Okay, so it’s more than tens.
It’s 25,000 people who have “signed” an online petition, sponsored by a pro-Clinton group, “VoteBooth.” And considering the fact that online petitions regularly gather hundreds of thousands of votes, coupled with the fact that 18 million people voted for Hillary Clinton during the primaries, it seems to me that 25,000 people is a remarkably low number of participants.
And, to quote a colleague of mine over at Melted Reel, “we all know how effective online petitions are, and how seriously everyone takes them…” </snark>.
CNN, of course, is taking it very seriously. How odd! An international news outlet taking time out of its busy schedule to report on the tallies of various online petitions… I wonder why CNN is so interested in Hillary for VP.
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Since my copious research has led me to the conclusion that you are the single finest political commentator on all of the World Wide Web, I feel compelled to avail myself of this opportunity to bring up something utterly unrelated to this post but on which I nonetheless crave your keen insight.
In all the campaigning going on–and it feels, by this point, that the 2008 presidential race has already been underway for approximately fourteen hundred years–one key issue never comes up, though it is clearly among the most important political problems facing our country today. That issue is this: When are they going to get rid of the Sixth Amendment, already?
I refer specifically to these words: “In all criminal prosecutions, the accused shall enjoy the right to a speedy and public trial, by an impartial jury of the State and district where in the crime shall have been committed…”
Why do I object to this language? The reason is obvious. Those words, though seemingly innocuous, lead directly to a situation that affects the most important person in this nation–me–by making him have to get up extremely early on Thursday, wear long pants despite the intense summer heat, and report for jury duty.
Jury duty! The most nefarious of all duties! The most tedious way to involve yourself in what is arguably the most tedious branch of the government. Even having to sit through the selection process, much less having to actually serve on the jury, is akin to having someone read a John Grisham novel aloud at you, despite your protestations. This is a torment I would wish on nobody. Least of all me.
Yet it’s afflicted me nonetheless. Won’t you please take up the charge? Only by immediate action (and I do mean immediate) can we realize the dream of a world where I won’t have to endure jury duty this Thursday. I know I can count on your support.